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Garry and Harry by Steven Madeja

Fathers Garry and Harry Giroux are twin brothers, both Roman Catholic priests in a small town in upstate New York. But in 2004, Father Harry was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s, and his brother Father Garry has been his caregiver ever since. “Garry and Harry” explores this fascinating story and the relationship of these brothers as they deal with their faith, family, and hope in the face of tragedy.



Copyright 2007 Steven Madeja, All Rights Reserved.

No data yet! views Posted Thursday, April 8th, 2010 / Back to Top

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13 Comments 1 Mentions

  1. Hope Carter Author Editor

    It is very beautiful though sad! Fr Harry has been a good friend for many years. What a beautiful tribut to Fr Garry!

    January 17, 2009 · Reply

  2. Guy Simonelli Author Editor

    Attitude of Gratitude: In June of 1995 Harry was the Chaplain on my first Youth Pilgrimage to Lourdes. Throughout our week, caring for the sick, Harry asked us to embrace an “attitude of gratitude.” These words are never mentioned in the video. These words ARE the video. These words ARE Gary & Harry.

    January 17, 2009 · Reply

  3. Marlene Jiampetti Author Editor

    Harry was always an inspiration for us and our family. His faith was always unwavering and whenever in his presence you felt the love and the caring he had for others. He showed acts of kindness, asking for nothing in return and God was always first and foremost in his life. He is extremely bright and his personality would light up a room. We could sit with him for hours and listen to stories about his faith, his travels and all the good times he shared with our family. I’ve shopped with Harry, cooked for him and on several occasions my husband and I stayed with him in Potsdam when he was at St. Lawrence. I remember the Easter that his beloved dog, Sarah or Maggy, passed away and he phoned me in tears, broken hearted over the loss of his precious dog. We talked for a long time that day. He was and still is a very important person in our lives and someone we will always love and cherish. Our hearts and prayers go out to Harry and especially to his brother, Garry and his sister, Peggy. God bless.

    January 18, 2009 · Reply

  4. Mark F.Yanulavich Author Editor

    Father Harry Giroux has been my friend, spiritual counselor and comedian since 1975.

    Harry was blessed with the truly wonderful gift of humor. He managed to blend it well with a glowing personality – which was revealed to us through wonderful stories, thoughtful and inspiring homilies, rampant sarcasm, gentle teasing and a ready wit.

    Perhaps that’s why children seemed to glow in his presence – he carried their same carefree nature. Beautifully, he acknowledged these God-given gifts of humor, lightheartedness and storytelling and applied it for our benefit – as he knew Jesus Christ intended for him to do. He used this larger-than-life personality of his as a perfect vehicle to attract people to him – people who trusted him with their inner thoughts, concerns, questions and problems – all so he could help shepherd them to God’s love.

    Oh, how well he used this tremendous gift – this wonderful talent of his – the same one we are likely to remember most about him. Humbly, throughout his life as a priest, Harry realized that this talent was merely God’s gift to him through the power of the Holy Spirit, and indeed, it was his calling.

    Harry has loved being a priest every day of his life. Some of us know him for how he spoke on Sundays, but it was every other day of the week that he gave a part of himself – his wisdom, his resounding laugh, his kind nature, his wit. Before Harry started to lose his cognitive abilities to Alzheimer’s Disease, he seemed to be everywhere. We all work very hard every week. We feel a little inundated at times. Yet Harry took on a blizzard of obligations each day as an active parish priest. Harry’s life was “working in the field.” Fourteen-and-16-hour days were normal. Troubled child, troubled teen, troubled marriage, baptisms, hearing confessions, visiting the sick, making you laugh, teaching the Gospel, prompting courage, traveling across the country to be with you – whatever the case, it seemed – he would open that day planner of his and find a date and a time for you. When he did find the time for you, his counsel always seemed to radiate with one common theme – for you to find a path to God.

    He loved us so we would love others; made us laugh so we would cheer others, taught us so we might teach others, advised us so we might be able to advise others. The more he gave of himself, it seemed, the more he received. Perhaps that’s why he always seemed so happy and fulfilled. He gave all he had, and tried to love as many of us as he was able – the truest reflection of his creator.

    Although he touched so many of us in so many different ways, he had a keen gift of properly balancing his love of God first, the love of his faithful, the love of friends and his love of his family. It wasn’t easy for him. But I believe he strove to accomplish this so each of us might have felt included in his life in a special way.

    When Harry was young, he was an especially stubborn child. One incident comes to mind that he shared with me years ago.

    The Giroux family home had been sold and Harry just could not seem to let the memories of the old house go. His Dad told him not to go back to the house, but Harry had to go back just one more time. As Harry was making his way through the house, he ran into his father, who evidently knew just how stubborn young Harry was.

    This stubborn nature of his would come in handy later in life, for his faith was unshakable and his convictions to the teachings of Jesus Christ were unwavering.

    For those of us whose lives depended on Harry’s help, finding ways to deal with his disease are burdensome. However, I do know that by this tragic event he would want us to know he was merely an instrument for Jesus who is here for us always. It is because he acted as that instrument so wonderfully that we miss his counsel and guidance. It is my belief that Harry would want to tell us to trust in Jesus, who will never leave us.

    “Religion is not for the weak, ” Harry once said in a sermon. “As anyone who has tried seriously to carry the Cross of Jesus well knows.”

    “We must constantly be challenging ourselves to see the excruciating choices we will have to make in life because we are Christians.”

    An irony, of course, is that while religion is not for the weak, that is just what most of us are. By ourselves, we will so often take the easy way out, the way that is popular or accepted. We are weak; but God is strong and only His grace and wisdom can build us up, can get us “in shape” for the “spiritual battle.” As Harry often says, “Trust in God. God is good. He will provide.”

    I remember the day Harry met with his physician in Plattsburgh who told him that he suspected that his cognitive degradation was most likely early onset Alzheimer’s Disease. As Harry got into his car, put his head down on the steering wheel and rightfully cried for a moment – he was overjoyed when he lifted his head and noticed a license plate on a car in front of him. The license plate – NEVRALONE – Harry felt was a message from God and he was so happy to share the news with me and my family.

    Over the 35 years I’ve known Harry – he has taught me a great number of his famous “sayings.” One I fondly remember and I often refer to it as “Harry’s trademark.” He would often say “Let them love you if they will, let them hate you if they must, but don’t ever let them forget you.”

    Well, we love you Harry. And we’ll definitely never forget you.

    January 19, 2009 · Reply

  5. James M. Hayes SJ Author Editor

    I met Harry at the Catholic Campus Ministry Meeting at Barry University in 1988. We became friends and we would see each other once a year at the campus ministry meetings. He had a great personality, a wonderful sense of fun, and so much charm. Years later when I served as vocation director I attended the World Congress on Vocations in Montreal. I bumped into Harry at this large convention. He told me his parish was only forty five minutes away and he had brought the youth group to the gathering. We had lunch one day, caught up on our lives, and stayed connected by phone. One weekend he invited me up to preach. He said “My parishoners are tired of hearing me.” It was delightful to meet the people and to see Plattsburgh where the old Jesuit novitiate was located and to visit his cabin in the Adirondacks. Garry joined us for dinner and it was fascinating to see the two personalities in play. Harry called me to tell me the news a few years ago. We spoke another time and I have written to him each year. This year his sister called to let me know how he was doing and she put Harry on the phone. He was his usual gracious self even though he had no idea who I was. I will keep Harry, Garry, and Peggy in my prayers and I do rejoice that God allowed us to cross paths. I am a better human being and a better priest because of my friendship with Harry.

    January 19, 2009 · Reply

  6. Chris Collins Author Editor

    This film is truly moving. Thank you Steve for letting me put it on the site! A lot of people are appreciating it. Could anyone let us know how Garry and Harry are doing today?!

    January 20, 2009 · Reply

  7. Deanna Kneussle Author Editor

    When I first moved here and joined St.Alexander’s Parish Fr. Harry was the parochial vicar. His homilies and his way with the youth were awe inspiring. I began work as the church secretary. Not only was he a close priest friend, but now also a boss. My children so enjoyed going to Mass while he was here. He had such a connection to the young adults. It was like he knew where they were, he could be frank, positive and he showed just how much he cared.
    I remember back when he was diagnosed how he spoke of his illness, but also stated that God would take care of him as he always did.

    I was so touched by the video. The love and caring of Fr. Garry is so evident. He is a true blessing for his brother. My heart goes out to Fr. Harry. The way he has accepted his illness just magnifies the love and closeness that he shares with the Lord. As Fr. Harry would always say, “May God Bless you”

    You are truly a gift from the Lord!

    January 27, 2009 · Reply

  8. Alan J. Lamica Author Editor

    Thank you, Garry and Peggy. I kept the Nov 26 08 North Country Catholic with your wonderful article, Peggy, thinking I’d write to commend you. Harry was a roommate at Wadhams Hall, and we went to St. Mary’s in Baltimore together. To think of this development, and to contemplate the loving acceptance you and Garry demonstrate leaves me at a loss for words. I can think of nothing but the last words of the Mass: “Thanks be to God.”

    January 28, 2009 · Reply

  9. Josh Hummel Author Editor

    I just transferred from Clarkson University! I spent a year and a half up there. I know about Potsdam, NY! I’m so happy to see pictures from there.

    February 13, 2009 · Reply

  10. Nicholas Fisher Author Editor

    Since I met Father Harry when he moved to St. Joseph’s as pastor, I have known him as a kind and loving person. Since I attended daily mass frequently, I got to see much of him. As a young guy, I used not to behave in daily mass, but as I got older (12 or 13) I started to appreciate it. After he got Alzheimer’s disease and moved in with Fr. Garry, I had not seen him for some time. A month ago, I went to see him at St. Joseph’s home. His present condition and will power and love has inspired me to start the process to become a priest for the diocese of Ogdensburg.

    June 27, 2009 · Reply

  11. Arlene(Cash) Martell Author Editor

    Garry, my heart goes out to you and Harry. Your lives are a testimony of how to hang in there with God when you encounter life’s inevitable struggles. I’ve been on the mission field for 6 years now- in China for the last 3 1/2. You are in my prayers.

    August 4, 2009 · Reply

  12. Amy Hurteau Author Editor

    I have only known Father Harry for a short period of time, and after watching this I have come to appreciate him even more than I have in the short time I have spent with him. I see him almost every day and I see so much love and peace within him especially when Father Garry is close by. God is definitely watching over them, and keeping them close no matter what the odds are. To now know Father Harry while he could still remember warms my heart and gives me a better understanding of what he is going through now. Thank you God for blessing us all with such a wonderful gift of two very loving and devoted brothers…..If only we could all be as special as Garry & Harry!

    January 5, 2010 · Reply

  13. Claudette Giroux Author Editor

    I want to thank you so very much for making this. Although it sadness me that Harry is going through this, to see both their faces again floods my memories.

    You see, I have not seen them since I was just a small girl of 7 years old. And they were so very grown to my eyes. They are my cousins, and in my travels I have often wondered what became them. Where they ended up living? What church one or the other would be in… They were only known to me only as “Harry’s Twins” . That laughter has been imbedded in my mind for nigh on 42 years. I can never thank you enough.

    January 17, 2012 · Reply

 

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